Being In Your Twenties Can Be Also Stressful – And That Is Totally Fine

Sometimes trying to figure out life seems like Algebra problem that you just can’t solve, especially when you are in your twenties and trying to find yourself, your interests, career and get experience.

While some people settled down for a regular job, maybe 9 to 5 type a thing, I was never into that staff – normal and boring. For me it’s always some challenge that drives my engine and for that reason – I still didn’t find myself. I got closer, though or at least I like to think  I did. If not, I changed a lot in past few years and that is all because of my drive to do different things.

Now I am in a stage where I don’t know my next move and it’s scary. I am twenty-five and I got into a huge doubt over my life choices. One time, on a 30th birthday party of my crazy European friend someone asked her if she is freaking out and feeling old. She answered: “I am perfectly happy because in my life I always waited to be thirty. When you are thirty that is when your life starts and when you have stuff figured out.” She had a good point but I always imagined that by the time I am that age, I will have a good job that I actually like, an apartment of my own, four-year degree, a dog and at least a long term relationship. To brake it down, I am five years away from that milestone, just started college for second time (since I dropped out of first one), no boyfriend, no apartment, no dog ( I do have two cats) and I just changed my career to get to a conclusion that I want to do something else after just few months. It is going to take me more than five years to get out of this mess and sort it all out.

So, in all this mess I started to wonder (hm, Carrie Bradshaw moment) is there a right way to live your twenties?

The more I think about my personal mess, the more I observe people around me in their twenties. To get into this super personal, the reason I am thinking about this today more than any other day is because my best friend broke the news tonight over a dinner that he wants to move to Thailand and be a cook for some famous Asian chef. He is twenty-three and his biggest “out of comfort zone” was when he got drunk on my birthday and passed out while vomiting in the shower – in front of me. Luckily, he survived and now it is him who is making a change. His biggest dream is to own a restaurant and since he was teenager he has been learning about it side by side with some well known and famous chefs. He is tired of only one opportunity and wants to do more while young and sort of find his style and in the end, his true self to become better and more successful.

My friend is that type of person that doesn’t care about anything and other people can make decisions instead of him, a very easy going dude and when he broke the news I stood there for a while, processing what he just said. “Thailand” he repeated. Wow, I never even been to Thailand and until recently didn’t even know where is it located until I played some geography game on my phone while waiting for some stupid appointment. Never been to some exciting place actually, I lived in Europe for quite awhile and now in the US. This conversation made me ask myself: where do I want to go? What are the things I want to do and experience? I want to do so many things and looking at other people I have a feeling I am falling behind.

I look at all these people in their twenties and all I see is: boom-lawyer, boom-finance major; bankers, advisors, OMG I am losing my mind and how did you figure it out so fast?

Sometimes talking to older people give me anxiety because they think that twenties are roses and chocolates. We are young and we have fears. We have doubts and make mistakes. They make it seem like when they were twenty, forty years ago it was so simple; go to school, get married, buy a house, get kids. Now what? How many people of my age don’t have proper friendships let alone relationships. Society is advertising social awkwardness and loneliness with Wi-Fi access so what we can hope for?

I almost graduated fashion school when on my final year I realized I am not who I want to be and packed my bags to another continent. Now I have doubts when it comes to choosing a career as I failed so many times and wanted to so much, that it gets scary real. What a life to have, questioning every step of the way while getting judged for being young.

Then, I realized that I don’t live life like others because I am me, twenty-five year old who taking it day by day, with no apartment, no dog, no boyfriend. I do have a bucket list that is getting to be quite a lot and my next task is to do exact same thing like my friend – travel.

Sometimes I wish life was an Algebra problem, because nowadays I can Google the solution to it…

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Review: Products That Changed My Life – Aroma Soap Lab by Renee Howard

Being someone who has problematic and sensitive skin, it’s really hard to find a good facial cream and scrub as all of them are giving me rash, redness or dry out my skin even more. As I confessed in one of my previous posts, I use Aquaphor  from Eucerin during winter months and in general when it’s windy but I couldn’t find a good cream during 90+ degrees.

While scrolling one day on Etsy, looking for some good handmade products, I found my little piece of heaven.

It is called AromaSoapLab owned by amazing girl Renee Howard. She is the girl that changed my skin forever. If you go to her page, you will find cool stuff that will literally change your life forever. Best part – they are affordable and organic.

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etsy.com/shop/AromaSoapLab

I looked carefully all products and decided to try Rose Hip infused plant based facial moisturizer because all other products can be miracles but if it doesn’t work on my face, it’s a lost case for me. So I placed my order and got it within few days. Since I am someone who is a makeup hoarder, I was excited to try out my new cream but also scared of how is my face going to turn out in few days and how am I going to get rid of acne after it.

That night, took a shower and decided to put my new baby on. The texture of this cream is like silk that started melting between my palms and my my skin became soft instantly. First impression: AWESOME.

Woke up in the morning, my skin smooth and soft, no dryness, no acne. Tried it for three days in a row, my skin just got better and radiant, few of pimples I had on my forehead were gone. It is a great product for summer and hot days because it’s very light and it feels like you don’t have anything on but it also didn’t disappoint me during windy and cold days. I was so happy for finding this product that I decided to try more.

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etsy.com/shop/AromaSoapLab

My next purchase was Tea Tree Mint Sea Clay facial scrub /Mask. I never had an opportunity to use any scrub or a mask more than twice because my skin had awful reaction on everything. From cheapest ones to the most expensive ones, it just didn’t work for me so I gave up finally on trying to find a perfect scrub and just wash my face for longer time, sometimes adding brown sugar to my soap just so I get little of scrubbing done.

Did the same thing trying out, three day rule and the result was clean and smooth skin, soft like a cloud.

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etsy.com/shop/AromaSoapLab

After great experience with this two products, I tried Tea Tree Mint Sea Clay Soap and currently waiting on Anise Mint Charcoal Olive Oil Soap as charcoal is the biggest hit that is happening in cosmetics world right now so expect a review soon on few similar products as well 🙂

Super excited for discovering her and hopefully this post will help change someone’s life like it did to mine!

 

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Why it’s Important to Experience a Shitty Job

It is common between people to complain about their bosses, their jobs, coworkers but how many times you felt like you would rather blow up the building than go inside and work in it? Way too many? Sorry to tell you this but you have a shitty job.

Climbing the ladder in Corporate America is not easy and it is definitely stressful but let’s face it – it shouldn’t make us miserable. Being a young, motivated person I was more than happy to accept promotion in corporate office that was 24/7 needy. Since I was single and had plenty of time on my hands, I figured this is a great opportunity for me to prove myself, get the experience and make good money to pay off my heavy shoe collection.

First few weeks were giving me a headache but I thought it is normal and didn’t complain to anyone even when my boss started piling up the work and literally abuse me because I was on salary and those 40 hours per week were off the table.

Few more months passed and I was exhausted from work, not sleeping, dealing with my boss who was never on site, giving me all the stuff to solve on my own, and then my coworkers and employees were just another pain to handle. My co-manager was very loose and relaxing the rules I was trying to establish with employees calling out sick, not showing up for work or just being unprofessional and he was literally driving me crazy. In one point I realized I have no support, no one to rely on, no one to complain to or not even someone who cares. The only thing that was holding me here were my clients. I had an awesome relationship with them and they would respect me more than my own boss.

The stress was getting worse and I stopped caring about my behavior, my uniform, my vocabulary – everything just went downhill. I was even in such a bad mood after leaving my workplace that I would fight with my friends, people in a supermarket – it just didn’t look good for me.

I turned around, it’s been two years since I started working there. Two years of stress, misery, problems, mental abuse and drinking. Drinking issues got out of hand as I couldn’t find better way to deal with problems. All I would talk about is my job and how bad it is, how much I work and don’t get appreciated for it and how I lost patience even with my clients. That place just worn me out and in my mid twenties I became old and grumpy.

On December 30th I was done. I literally mean D-O-N-E. Tired of yelling, screaming, crying, suspending and feeling all alone I got into a fight with my co-manager and walked out. Yes, walked out at noon on a work day, one day before New Years Eve. Cursed him out and left. Got home, fell asleep on the couch and woke up five hours later to an-email saying I was terminated. I started to laugh. Don’t know if more from happiness or concern how the hell am I going to pay my bills now. I responded to the email saying you can’t fire a person that quit their job but I was kind of sad. All this stress became part of my life and I don’t know for any better. What the hell am I going to do now with all this stress-free time?

It was New Years Eve and no one noticed I was not in the office but I did. I was not there at 7 AM, hating my job and wishing to be sick, mentally unstable or something. They even had a joke for me saying I will leave that place in a stretcher. Almost.

Depression kicked in and I couldn’t get my shit together because I thought that every highly paid job is tough and demanding, with daily problems and anxiety. Trust me when I tell you that I was deeply wrong and so are you if you have the same thinking. Yes, certain jobs are hard and tough to deal with but this devastating feeling is not one that you should feel at all times. All the tears and torture, sleepless nights and anxiety over a job was totally unnecessary but I won’t call it a mistake. Mistakes are there to teach us so I will always appreciate the experience but sometimes you just need to say: “Enough.”

You are probably wondering, alright, you just told us your sad little story but what is the point?

The point is that after being depressed for probably two or three months, panicking over my destiny and American Dream I was trying to build I was surprisingly – FINE. I got a part-time job then after that another part-time and I was rollin’. Didn’t know where but at least I was paying bills on time. At times it was tough but I decided to fix my life and find something that will make me HAPPY.

Then happened what was natural to come – I was working one weekend and got called into the office by my bosses. They said they loved what I do and asked me if I am interested in full-time-better-pay position. It was a great day, and soon after great week, month and now almost a year. What was important about it is that as soon as I left my previous job, I stopped being crazy nervous and mad at all times. I became relaxed, talked a lot with different people about their experiences and their first serious jobs, how do they handle stress at work and how to stay sane. I collected their individual experiences, combined it with my own valuable experience and became a better person on all levels, not just at work.

Now I know how to appreciate my job and money that I am earning but I also appreciate myself. Don’t let your bosses or coworkers abuse you, mistreat you or harass you. I need to say there is always light in the end of the tunnel and you are probably now thinking: “OMG, what a cliche” but it is true. One doors closed, two more opened – that is a rule for everything, sometimes we just need to let things go. You shouldn’t hold onto something if it’s not worth it and being miserable for your job is definitely not worth it. There is always a place that will appreciate you and love you for who you are and what you do but also I need to say this: If I didn’t have this experience with bad employer, I wouldn’t be so grateful for having this one right now. I learned so much from that experience, how to handle and respect myself, my health, my time and overall how to be better. And improving yourself is what should be on top of your list. After a bad workplace you might even switch profession if you realize that the current one is not a good fit for you. Anything can happen and that is a good thing. Changes are scary but great because that is how  you figure out life, what you like or dislike, what you can or what are your priorities.

Sorry to break it down for you or make you question yourself and your job but what makes you melancholic is not good for you (unless you are a songwriter 🙂 ) and needs to end. You will find something better, a place that knows how to respect you and make you improve and grow even bigger.

Do not hold it for yourself, talk to people, tell them what is going on, report abusers and leave when you hate it more than you love it. Waking up and hating your life is the worst thing it can happen to you so change what you can, become better for yourself.

Good Luck!

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Solid Food – Yes or No

In last few years, all we could see is celebrities going gluten free, dairy-free, vegan and so on. It became Hollywood trend to advertise healthy and liquid food. For me, that was always sort of funny as I loved to chew on my food and enjoy taste of chipotle chicken or chocolate cake. But now in 2016 when food is such a big concern, I realized that those poster celebrities are not just eccentric – they are smart.
Living in New York area makes it hard to find farm to table food and definitely takes extra time and effort to shop. I have spent a year doing a research on healthy food, the concept of healthy food, where and how to shop and eat. Thanks to Mike’s Organic Delivery I solved most of my problems when it comes to dairy and meats. This site is great for grocery shopping when you are stuffing your fridge and freezer with healthy groceries like whole milk, chicken breast, steak, greens. It is great for big shopping list. But what to do when I am just craving for some fruit salad, yogurt or a snack like chips?
In my previous posts I published recipes and discussed about whole milk and meat. Not afraid to say I am carnivore but do respect every other choice. It was never an issue to stop eating meat for religion reasons (I am Orthodox Christian) and enjoy being vegan four couple of weeks before Christmas and Easter. For this year, I went vegetarian for few weeks before the fast started as for some reason I got sick from bacon and beef smell. When I observed food more closely I seen how bad processed supemarket food is and what goes inside. It just made me sick even looking at it.

Before this Easter I did my fast for seven weeks and it was easy. My choice of stores were Whole Foods and Trader Joe’s for the most part and my usual: guacamole, veggie burgers, hummus, tofu (even though I avoid eating soy), non-dairy, egg free bread, dark chocolate, rice, fries, tones of veggies, fruits and of course, coconut milk ice cream. Great discovery was Chipotle’s Sofritas that is vegan. This was all happening in time when Chipotle was involved in several scandals with E. Coli and discriminating management practices and we would always comment how couple of years ago, they had the same problem and stopped using tomatoes for their guacamole and were wondering what ingredient they will drop now.
The fast went great and Easter celebration was wonderful. After two months not eating animal products I was ready to go back to normal and not be pain to my coworkers when we order food – when it happened. One phone call from the store changed it all. It was recall – Dr. Praeger’s California Veggie Burgers that were contaminated with Listeria monocytogenes. My first reaction was what in the world is Listeria and what kind of effects it has. Few minutes on Google I learned it is very dangerous infection that can cause death. Luckily, I didn’t have any symptoms but that gave me anxiety when in supermarket again and of course, I didn’t stop reading about it. In some point you need to stop reading but I just couldn’t. And that was again, scary experience for my stomach where I got sick of just thinking about solid food. After that day only thing I could process was a smoothie and maybe a piece of chicken. I tried not to go extreme, first so I don’t get sick of drastic change and not to become “one of those white people” who are drinking their food. I tried to eat homemade pancakes with some fruit but I can’t eat that much sugar every morning.
Therefore, I needed a solution and I found it. One solid meal a day so I can chew and several different smoothies and yogurts to drink and get full. The most surprising thing is that I actually can get full of just drinking these fruits and vegetables, as I didn’t believe in that and I used every opportunity to mock “those people.”
My friends laugh at me and say “white people shit” to my concerns and to certain extent I do agree, especially when someone says gluten – free I think about the same thing they say to me. But food is one of the most important things in our life. If our food is not healthy, not satisfying or safe our health is at risk, our mood changes and that is when it gets complicated. Yes, it is hard to eat differently than most of the people in my environment, it is definitely hard to find organic, all natural groceries. I don’t talk about this and I don’t advertise it within my friends that much but I thought of sharing my story as this is sensitive subject to bring up and I like to hear different opinions.

Today, my day started with coffee and smoothie of well washed strawberries, blueberries and raspberries and whole milk yogurt. For work I am preparing kale, banana, pineapple and touch of whole milk from Mike’s Delivery. For dinner I might go with a salad if I don’t have fresh banana to sprinkle it with nuts and Nutella. Yes, I didn’t give up on chocolate. That is something it was not involved in health scandal recently. Thank God 🙂

Feel free to express your thoughts on this subject in comments below!  😉

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New Rubric on AllCoffeeTalk

It’s been crazy last few months. I quit my job, started a blog, went back to school, moved to another town… And it’s only May. In these last few weeks, I had a great experience exploring my inner self and met amazing people to help me with my journey.

I started a blog so I can express myself and my beliefs to others and to have fun. It came natural to me as I like to travel, cook and do makeup. But I didn’t realize how much impact this blog will have on my life.

With that being said, I will start a new rubric on AllCoffeeTalk simply called: Thoughts. It will be the area where I will post about some part of my life, some stories, opinions and spiritual improvements. I learned over the course of years that sometimes you just need to hear the truth, no matter how cruel it is.

Sometimes, I just need a quote to change the course of my day or bad period of thoughts and actions.
When someone told me to start writing things down I gave them a laugh. But then, I started just to prove them wrong. Now, I’ve been writing for 3 years and couple of things came out of that. One, I feel much better when I put things on paper. Two, while writing, I realize things that I normally wouldn’t. Things become clear and I find solution quicker. And three, when I read it again after a year or so, I realize how much stronger I become, how I made it through even if in that moment I thought I wouldn’t and how I wouldn’t even stress about that if it happened right now. It is an experience that will stay marked on a paper, because we should not forget who we were on the beginning and that learning process we had to go through, and tears we had to cry out.

All guest posts are welcome. You have a story please, share it. You are struggling with certain things in your life? Write about it, we will post it and listen to other what they have to say. In this area, you can post as someone else, you can use different name, write a story about other people, whatever will make you feel better.

I hope this stories will help you to not feel alone and improve you at becoming a stronger, better person.

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Fashion Alert! Kardashian Sets a New Hairstyle For Spring 2016

Kim K fashion alert!

Another fashion rule from Kardashian family coming for this spring – Dutch braid.

If you are following Kardashians on Instagram, then you couldn’t miss new looks that are now spreading worldwide!

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Mrs. West presented new hair-do for Kris Jenner’s Christmas Party, where even her daughter North was matching with braids. It slowly started catching on until her appearance at Saturday Night Live where Kanye West presented his new album “Life of Pablo.”

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After that, you couldn’t look at news feed and not see girls having the same style, and even celebrities started rockin’ this hair.

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If you are following latest trends, then you probably tried to do it in front of the bathroom mirror, just like me. If not, check how to make this cool braid right here.

Kardashian family is famous for setting trends, like bleached hair, lip fillers and many more.

Love it, hate it, you will see it!

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Skincare and makeup confession

 

If you live on East Coast, you are probably hugging space heater right now and forgot how outside looks like. On days when you decide to punish yourself and go out, your skin shouldn’t be punished. Here are easy steps to save your skin from cracking and drying and still look fab.

Facial cream

It took me awhile (about 6 years of frustration, skin rash and endless crying) to find right facial cream. My skin varies from extremely dry to very oily and honestly, it’s annoying. Changing creams and formulas, from organic and baby products, to witches potions and shamrock roots, everything gave me pimples and redness. Until I found perfect product that saved my life. Aquaphor from Eucerin is literally the best thing that exists on the planet. If you didn’t make face palm after reading this, then you know you can use Aquaphor on daily basis, if your skin is extremely sensitive.

During winter, I use Burt’s Bees products as makeup primer, since my skin gets really dry.

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Makeup or no, facial cream is a must on every day basis because it takes care of skin texture and pores.

Foundation

People who know me for 10+ years scream in shock when and IF they ever see me without makeup during winter. My skin is pale and very sensitive so makeup helps in protecting from cracking and peeling on days when it is freezing outside. When choosing right foundation, you need to consider your skin type and tone, for mine I go with Dream Liquid Mousse from Maybelline and L’oreal True Match LUMI, that I actually mix in to get nice toned, natural color. Finish it off with Maybelline Shine Free Loose Powder and blush my cheeks with ALMAY smart shade. You might noticed that all of this products are drugstore makeup but for day makeup I really don’t need that fleeky Kim Kardashian look because I don’t have cameras on every corner and paparazzi stalkers.

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My stalker carries a paper bag with vodka inside so he is not getting MAC cosmetics treatment.

With all those makeup artists on Instagram, “fans” are forgetting one thing. Makeup artists are using high-end full coverage makeup products that are heavy on your skin and have so much shine and glitter that if you wear it in a supermarket, people think you are radioactive. Light to medium coverage is all you need for daily makeup. Also, Instagram tutorials are for night makeup, which is something different and clubs, restaurants and gala events go with that heavy red carpet look, instead schools, stores and gossip parties at Starbucks. I will make a special tutorial for full coverage makeup.

Eyebrows

Ok, let’s face it, bold eyebrows are the biggest hit since belly piercing and my time goes mostly on doing them. If you follow makeup trends then the last rule about expensive makeup products on daily basis doesn’t apply here. Go spend all your money on brow pencils and mousses, go, and don’t look back. My current obsession is Anastasia Beverly Hills pencil, that is absolutely magical. It gives you subtle, natural look and it can go from thick to thin without Angelina Jolie effect.

The 59th Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

Angelina Jolie (Photo by SGranitz/WireImage)

Please, don’t make this eyebrows. Ever.

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This is much better.

From here it’s really up to you, if you prefer to have eye makeup or finish up with lipstick or lip gloss, I’m sure you will look fabulous no matter what!

When day is over and makeup needs to go 😦 , whatever method you use to remove it, make sure you moisture your skin before bed with night face cream, so skin can stay radiant.

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