It is common between people to complain about their bosses, their jobs, coworkers but how many times you felt like you would rather blow up the building than go inside and work in it? Way too many? Sorry to tell you this but you have a shitty job.
Climbing the ladder in Corporate America is not easy and it is definitely stressful but let’s face it – it shouldn’t make us miserable. Being a young, motivated person I was more than happy to accept promotion in corporate office that was 24/7 needy. Since I was single and had plenty of time on my hands, I figured this is a great opportunity for me to prove myself, get the experience and make good money to pay off my heavy shoe collection.
First few weeks were giving me a headache but I thought it is normal and didn’t complain to anyone even when my boss started piling up the work and literally abuse me because I was on salary and those 40 hours per week were off the table.
Few more months passed and I was exhausted from work, not sleeping, dealing with my boss who was never on site, giving me all the stuff to solve on my own, and then my coworkers and employees were just another pain to handle. My co-manager was very loose and relaxing the rules I was trying to establish with employees calling out sick, not showing up for work or just being unprofessional and he was literally driving me crazy. In one point I realized I have no support, no one to rely on, no one to complain to or not even someone who cares. The only thing that was holding me here were my clients. I had an awesome relationship with them and they would respect me more than my own boss.
The stress was getting worse and I stopped caring about my behavior, my uniform, my vocabulary – everything just went downhill. I was even in such a bad mood after leaving my workplace that I would fight with my friends, people in a supermarket – it just didn’t look good for me.
I turned around, it’s been two years since I started working there. Two years of stress, misery, problems, mental abuse and drinking. Drinking issues got out of hand as I couldn’t find better way to deal with problems. All I would talk about is my job and how bad it is, how much I work and don’t get appreciated for it and how I lost patience even with my clients. That place just worn me out and in my mid twenties I became old and grumpy.
On December 30th I was done. I literally mean D-O-N-E. Tired of yelling, screaming, crying, suspending and feeling all alone I got into a fight with my co-manager and walked out. Yes, walked out at noon on a work day, one day before New Years Eve. Cursed him out and left. Got home, fell asleep on the couch and woke up five hours later to an-email saying I was terminated. I started to laugh. Don’t know if more from happiness or concern how the hell am I going to pay my bills now. I responded to the email saying you can’t fire a person that quit their job but I was kind of sad. All this stress became part of my life and I don’t know for any better. What the hell am I going to do now with all this stress-free time?
It was New Years Eve and no one noticed I was not in the office but I did. I was not there at 7 AM, hating my job and wishing to be sick, mentally unstable or something. They even had a joke for me saying I will leave that place in a stretcher. Almost.
Depression kicked in and I couldn’t get my shit together because I thought that every highly paid job is tough and demanding, with daily problems and anxiety. Trust me when I tell you that I was deeply wrong and so are you if you have the same thinking. Yes, certain jobs are hard and tough to deal with but this devastating feeling is not one that you should feel at all times. All the tears and torture, sleepless nights and anxiety over a job was totally unnecessary but I won’t call it a mistake. Mistakes are there to teach us so I will always appreciate the experience but sometimes you just need to say: “Enough.”
You are probably wondering, alright, you just told us your sad little story but what is the point?
The point is that after being depressed for probably two or three months, panicking over my destiny and American Dream I was trying to build I was surprisingly – FINE. I got a part-time job then after that another part-time and I was rollin’. Didn’t know where but at least I was paying bills on time. At times it was tough but I decided to fix my life and find something that will make me HAPPY.
Then happened what was natural to come – I was working one weekend and got called into the office by my bosses. They said they loved what I do and asked me if I am interested in full-time-better-pay position. It was a great day, and soon after great week, month and now almost a year. What was important about it is that as soon as I left my previous job, I stopped being crazy nervous and mad at all times. I became relaxed, talked a lot with different people about their experiences and their first serious jobs, how do they handle stress at work and how to stay sane. I collected their individual experiences, combined it with my own valuable experience and became a better person on all levels, not just at work.
Now I know how to appreciate my job and money that I am earning but I also appreciate myself. Don’t let your bosses or coworkers abuse you, mistreat you or harass you. I need to say there is always light in the end of the tunnel and you are probably now thinking: “OMG, what a cliche” but it is true. One doors closed, two more opened – that is a rule for everything, sometimes we just need to let things go. You shouldn’t hold onto something if it’s not worth it and being miserable for your job is definitely not worth it. There is always a place that will appreciate you and love you for who you are and what you do but also I need to say this: If I didn’t have this experience with bad employer, I wouldn’t be so grateful for having this one right now. I learned so much from that experience, how to handle and respect myself, my health, my time and overall how to be better. And improving yourself is what should be on top of your list. After a bad workplace you might even switch profession if you realize that the current one is not a good fit for you. Anything can happen and that is a good thing. Changes are scary but great because that is how you figure out life, what you like or dislike, what you can or what are your priorities.
Sorry to break it down for you or make you question yourself and your job but what makes you melancholic is not good for you (unless you are a songwriter 🙂 ) and needs to end. You will find something better, a place that knows how to respect you and make you improve and grow even bigger.
Do not hold it for yourself, talk to people, tell them what is going on, report abusers and leave when you hate it more than you love it. Waking up and hating your life is the worst thing it can happen to you so change what you can, become better for yourself.