When I write, I usually write for myself. I have a big Word document of couple of hundreds of pages with my thoughts, events that I found interesting and just summarizing life. Sometimes, I even record myself if I am not close to a computer.
So, I decided to use this blog as a way of expressing some thoughts and seeing if anyone else feels the same way (or even opposite).
One of the biggest writing influences on me, ironically, had Carrie Bradshaw. I think questions that TV show raised are valid in 2020 as much as they were in 2000. Since then, society raised a lot of fundamental questions such as gender roles, equal pay, gender identity, abortions, and certainly, racial issues.
Two events inspired me to write this blog today. First one was a podcast: I love podcasts. I like motivational speakers like Jay Shetty, I listen to NPR’s Health Kit Podcast; I even listen to the news through this platform.
Well, if you are a Michelle Obama fan (disclaimer: I am not discussing politics in this post) then you probably know she has a podcast on Spotify.
It was last weekend, and I was listening to her podcast at my house, minding my own business, as people would say nowadays. In this episode called What Your Mother Never Told You About Health, Michelle Obama and Dr. Sharon Malone discuss topics such as menopause, hormones, how to talk to your kids about sexual health, etc. One sentence in their physical health vs. looking skinny discussion, had me stop everything I was doing. Obama said: “Women are rewarded for not looking their age,” and I was speechless.
The second event that triggered me to write was a news article in New York Post that read: Texas woman loses 70 pounds after an ex-boyfriend says she’s “too fat” to date.
I was upset, not even sure at who but I was definitely cussing at my phone. First of all, I salute this woman for her dedication. I absolutely love a good transformation story, especially when it’s a slap to a chauvinistic asshole like this ex. But I couldn’t stop thinking how if it was other way around, the headline would be completely different. Men are so comfortable with who they are, but women have to make all these adjustments: lose weight, look skinny, dye hair, have nice nails, perfect our skin routine and yes, look younger than our age.
Now, I am generalizing, I understand that not all men are the same, as much as not all women are the same but I very much live in a society where this is the norm. I get up every day to put on makeup, do my hair, look presentable, chose pair of shoes that matches my outfit; meanwhile, men get up, half-ass brush their teeth, scratch their balls a few times, pick up a shirt/smell the shirt/yes, it’s good for one more day, and wear the same pair of jeans the whole week.
If you don’t relate to my description above, I want to know where you live, where you work, how much are taxes and how can I get there. Because in 2020, the gap between a man and a woman is still huge; I am talking health and social standards, wages, workplace treatment… abortions!
Listening and reading about these issues makes me angry, makes me sad, makes me upset. How come we are still being judged on the basis of our looks, when we can run for presidents now!? We statistically do better jobs than men, and we are still being judged for bleeding, or being in a menopause, or for being to heavy, or too skinny or not dressing “appropriately enough” for men? Women marched for this shit, decades ago. Gloria Steinem must be pissed in 2020.
I haven’t listened to Obama podcast since.